The Girl Who Wanted To Be A Mermaid
She lies on her back. The waves carry her, indifferent. She hears muffled sounds she cannot comprehend. She could be anywhere – floating in the middle of the ocean or drifting through space. The rest of the world does not exist anymore. Maybe she doesn’t either. For the first time in what feels like years her mind has stopped buzzing. She feels grounded. The sea agrees with her: there is nothing to worry about, for the ebb and flow of life will always take her wherever she needs to be. The only place she could be. The wind must have died down now because the ripples aren’t threatening to submerge her anymore. All is quiet, even the water. She feels her hair floating gracefully around her head and wishes that she were a mermaid.
She would sink head first into the deep blue and leave land to more brutal creatures.
She would explore all that remains unknown to humans. She would report only to the moon and to the sea. She would not miss the messy life she would leave behind. Buried underwater, secrets don’t seem as heavy. Everything is slippery here, and right and wrong don’t matter. She would not need to have a name, for her very existence would be enough to matter. She would become a myth; the Lady of the Deep. Her mermaid existence, only half human, would surely be more fulfilling than this half-lived life. She craves simplicity – to have no purpose other than that of being alive. Nothing more. Existing without thinking about it, without thinking about why. She wants to stay here all night; to leave humanity and its pointless search for purpose. Here in the sea, there is no such thing. A fish is a fish. And this – this is water.